we are but older children, dear

This one is my random catch-all entry, although much of it will have to do with progress on my half-assed diet and exercise program.

As to that, I now fit in the pants which were a little too tight for me when I bought them on sale for like, $12 at Macy's a week and a half ago. They are flax and tan-colored, and while I wouldn't have imagined wearing anything like them a year ago (too adult-looking, maybe), I'm now finding that I'm starting to feel like the adult who should be wearing them. They're for work in Korea, but they actually look kind of cute, too. And, of course, they're super-practical.

I've also been exercising fairly regularly. My new idea was just to try to do some type of exercise for at least 20 minutes a day but not beat myself up if I didn't. Turns out, this works well for me. I usually exercise a little more than the 20 minutes, I've started trying to do push-ups (something I haven't been able to do since gym class as far as I know), I've started jogging (which kind of makes me want to vomit, but I know I'll get better if I try), and I can see muscles in my legs again in places where they'd gone away. Plus, I'm actually EXCITED to exercise now. Sometimes when I come home I'm actually looking forward to it.

However, I am back on the sugar-train again. The weekend of the fourth was particularly taxing, in that I went to a horror movie fest at Nathan's where I gave myself permission to eat "whatever". "Whatever" mainly turned out to be half a can of Coke and an entire bag of Trader Joe's cinnamon almonds, in addition to some healthier stuff like hummus, so it could have been worse, but there were a hell of a lot of calories in those cinnamon almonds, and a lot of it was from the sugary coating. Oh well. I also ate ice cream cones on the 4th at April's, however. And I ordered a cookie at Laughing Planet today, which I haven't done in forever. So, for a girl who wasn't going to eat sugar for another two weeks, I sure have eaten a lot of the stuff. Meh. That's okay. I can always get back on the wagon. Not going to beat myself up anymore.

Feeling pretty good. My mood has been improving a lot.

Lee and I are definitely dealing with some stress, but I think that will be okay too. I may have started to turn a corner in that department anyhow. I'm starting to feel like maybe part of the adventure of being in a relationship is dealing with relationship problems and worries, and working through them. Like half the point is actually the work part. I could be wrong, but since Lee and I are healthy on so many levels, since we communicate well, we love and respect each other, and since we share so much in common, I feel like getting married is still the right idea and working out our problems will be beneficial in the end. It flies in the face of all those idealized visions I have of "people about to get married" - that I should be dewy-eyed and dopey. But, at the same time, Lee and I have been together for over 5 years and been through a lot during that time. So yeah. Maybe I'm just growing up, who knows?

Life is pretty good in general. I'm still a bit stressed out about money, since I'm putting a lot on credit cards this summer, but Lee is super-confident that we'll have jobs before the end of September, likely even sooner. And then it's off to a land where I can earn a decent wage.

Tim and I are talking again. Which is really good, because I didn't realize how much I missed him and how good of a friend he has always been until we weren't.

Life is trucking along, in short. The next few months are going to be all about: traveling, shopping for things for Korea, interviewing/taking care of paperwork, etc. for Korea, going through my stuff, packing, cleaning, and eating as much vegan food as possible.

About that last I am a bit worried. Part of me thinks I should buy some clothes 2 sizes too small, just in case I really do have to subsist on a diet of mainly bok choy, tofu, rice and mushrooms. Hopefully we'll find something more substantial to put in our gobs other than Jiffy peanut butter.

I was going to write a big Fourth of July entry too, but I'm feeling like moving around instead so I'll just sum it up - Horror Movie Party at Nathan's ("no, this is why they call it the pumphouse"), Swimming at April's, sex during the fireworks (fireworks really are overrated, it turns out), Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings at the Waterfront Blues Festival on Sunday night. Good times.

Hope Everyone Out There is Doing Well!

Love,
Jen

So tonight after the Multnomah County Bike Fair was the third naked ride of this naked ride season. It was my first daylight ride (evening light ride, technically, I guess), but my second post-MCBF ride. It might have been the most fun naked ride ever, topped only (possibly) by my first naked ride of all.

I thought it was just going to be a short one, but we ended up going up Belmont, down Hawthorne, across the bridge, into the Salmon Street Fountain (where we rode circles through the fountain and I got soaked in the crotch by the water - actually LOTS of fun), then through downtown, over the Burnside Bridge, through some of industrial NE/SE, then onto the East Bank Esplanade going North, then back through lower SE. It was a fair amount of work, but totally enjoyable the whole way.

There was a moment on the Esplanade, where the sun was setting red in the sky over the river and the Steel Bridge, where I was so happy to be alive I thanked God*. I just felt totally at peace, completely happy. Biking naked is on the list of things that are known to make me feel that way.

Anyway, it was a great ride. April and I actually got to ride near each other for once, I got to nurse my little crush on Rev. Phil (yeah, can't help it), and generally I just got to be totally free. This is not something I will get to be or do in Korea, so I'm living it up now while I can.

Anyway, it was the perfect ending to a good day at the Multnomah County Bike Fair.

As to the Fair, it was pretty standard - watched the jousts and some of the other competitions, saw a particularly good show from the Sprockettes, ate a delicious chocolate cream-filled Voodoo Donut, sat in the sun in my halter top. Good times were had by all.

Gonna go now. Get off the internet and such. Have a great night everyone! :)

*I know there are atheists on my friends list, but remember not everyone's god concept is an old bearded man. Mine is so amorphous it could be considered more like the Force or some sort of unified consciousness. Whatever the case, my god concept likes nudity, happiness, joy, freedom and beautiful views of rivers with sunset.

Lee and I went on the Bowie vs. Prince ride tonight.

I have to say, I was a bit underwhelmed.

I was expecting more dancing, louder and better music and more stops at more interesting places. Instead, the ride started late, I started the ride cold and didn't get much warmer, the sound system has some kind of problem which made it a bit too soft, there seemed to be very few songs on the rotation - like we heard "The Pope" (one of Prince's weaker songs) maybe 3 times and never heard "Gett Off" or countless other Prince classics -, we stopped only a couple places and only one of them was very good for dancing (oddly, the one that worked was in the courtyard of a new condo development without tenants yet. The whole ride ended up in this weird industrial area off of Interstate by the river. We left without checking out the final locale. Mainly because we were both pretty tired and worn out by this time, but also (on my end) because whereas if it had been a nice night I might have been fine hanging out in a weird industrial area by the river, it was instead really wet and cold still and it just seemed supremely uninviting.

I think the ride would have been more enjoyable to me if I was a person who enjoys drinking beer in parking lots. But I am not. In fact, drinking beer in parking lots is about the most boring thing I can imagine doing ever. I would probably rather sip green tea in line at the DMV, truth be told. I guess that sounds kind of nuts, but there you are. Drinking green tea in line at the DMV, my mind would grow sharper and I could observe all the crazy people in line, and maybe make idle conversation with one of them.

Drinking beer tends to make me sleepy pretty quick and maybe horny. But if I'm horny I generally don't want to be in a parking lot. (Well, not since I was 18, at least. ;)...) And if I'm sleepy, I definitely don't want to be on a bike ride. Really, if I'm going to not be alert, I'd much rather be in bed with my man. But I guess it's a moot point, because I didn't drink any beer in the parking lots anyway, but that's what most people were doing.

Anyway, the ride probably would have been about 5x better with either a better sound system, a better playlist or nicer weather.

As it was, it was kind of - well - good exercise. And I got my donut at the end, even though we didn't stop at Voodoo Donuts on the ride. Lee and I went there on our own and I finally ate a Vegan Fruit Loop donut and it was divine.

Tomorrow night I'll probably check out the first part of the Solstice Ride and drop in on Jesse's birthday party.

This summer is already going by so quickly.

Current Mood: slightly cranky

Today I:

- graduated and experienced the oxymoron which is "Portland State logistics."
- ate lunch at Vita with my loving family
- celebrated at Voicebox with my family and friends and sang lots of great duets, including some Cyndi Lauper with my Uncle David
- BIKED NAKED!!!! THIRD YEAR RUNNING!!!! And it was actually bigger this year than ever. Plus we were up front with the banner and the speakers blasting good music and the crazy two person "hamster wheel" sort of bike that the people can actually roll over in while they're riding. It kicked ass! I left earlier than I wanted to because I wanted to stick with Lee and he was tired after our long day, but it was still an amazing time. We did the downtown circuit a few times and it was hopping; we rode over the Burnside and Hawthorne Bridges. Basically it kicked all kinds of ass.

And karaoke deserves an entry this long too, but I'm still hopped up on my WNBR adrenaline!

:)

More Later!

Love,
Jen

- In 4 days I can eat sugar again (if I want to). That's right, it will have been a MONTH without sugar in 4 days!!!!! I didn't think I could do it, but I did it, and during the most stressful months of school, too!

- In 4 days I also graduate from f-ing college! What the fuck? How did this happen? But it will!

- Between now and then I still have to:

take final exams in my Coen Brothers class and Spanish 203
give my final performance for acting
write up my character sheet for that performance
clean out my gym locker that I barely used the last two terms
somehow transfer 3 years of school papers onto a disk or something
verify that my DARS report is really in order (DARS report being the sadistic method with which the school determines if you're going to graduate with all your requirements fulfilled. You generally have to see an advisor 3-4 times to convince this program that you have completed said requirements.)

- After that I have to do WAY TOO MANY THINGS related to getting out of Portland and into Korea within the space of 3 months or less. Yikes. I am not ready for that. But I'm also not ready to go into deeper and deeper debt or work some totally crap job in Portland, Oregon, even if I do love this crazy city.

- Fortunately there will also be lots o' leisure time this summer, at least non-work time. I'm working very few nanny hours this summer and I think most of the rest of my time will be taken up cleaning/organizing my stuff in preparation for moving to Korea, getting paperwork in order for the same move, saying goodbye to Portland by partaking in many fun activities, hopefully with my awesome friends.

That's all for now. See many of you at my Graduation Party and/or The World Naked Bike Ride. <3

So it's looking like-

Bachelorette Party on Saturday, 25th of July
Wedding on Sunday the 26th at wild and beautiful spot yet to be decided on
Reception-ish thingamajig same night, no idea where or what - probably just a nice meal out or something, since Lee's sister and her family will coincidentally be arriving in town

What do people think? I'm not sure how big the wedding itself is going to be yet - notice on that VERY SOON - but I'll take as many bachelorettes as I can get! "Dirty Dancing" in the park followed by karaoke madness and possibly getting me lightly (not completely) drunk, as there is no precedent for what happens to drunk Jens the following day and I don't want to test it on my wedding eve.

- work as little as possible without going broke
- try to obtain one more credit card so can go on trip to Wisconsin to visit sick father, grandma's house about to be sold, beloved lake - hopefully taking Lee with me on said trip
- live on very small daily budget in order to facilitate not-working thing
- cook a lot (goes w. budget)
- appreciate all the many free and cheap things Portland has to offer (bike fair, outdoor movies, people-watching, use PSU I.D. to nefariously attend NW Film Center screenings post-graduation, fountain-hopping, street fairs, art openings, outdoor Shakespeare, $5 festivals with bands, bike trails, etc.
- appreciate all the free and cheap things I can do wherever I am - meditate, reading, writing, exercise, biking, cooking, baking, collaging, zine-making (well, not free if you print copies, but Lee does work at Kinko's again), digital photography, hanging with friends in parks, picnics, videos
- live in borrowed luxury for 1 week at family reunion near Santa Rosa, California, right on the Russian River and near the Ewok Redwoods!
- sift through 7 years of my life so I can figure out what's worth taking/storing and what needs to be let go of
- READ for PLEASURE!!!!
- Exercise every day (ambitious, yes, but if I keep it to 20 minutes as the minimum and count things like yoga stretches for off-days, then this should be a snap)
- Re-watch "Lost" with the Doc Arzt Lost Blog "Lost" re-watch. It's conceivable I'll even start my own "Lost" blog. I know, terrible, right?
- Get my shit together for future recommendation letters, etc. for grad school within the next 3 years. Meet with as many professors as possible to discuss what it's like, how they got to be a professor, etc.
- Enjoy time with my brother while I have it. I will miss him terribly when we move to Korea.

May. 28th, 2009 04:02 pm an interesting meme I got from offloe

I know, I know, another book meme. But I enjoyed this one. It was quick and it gave me insight (which I will reveal below the cut, so as not to prejudice anyone's list.)

Basically, just list (fast as you can - try not to edit) 15 books that will always stick with you. Mine are below the cut - GO!

( Read more... )

So today, Lee and I:

- went to brunch at Sweetpea, where I broke my sugar fast a TINY bit in order to have some of the berry cobbler. But I ate a nice, small portion, and only that because it was part of the buffet. I don't regret it. :)

- rode down to the Waterfront and hung out by the fountain and on the lawn near the Rose Festival.

- went to Powell's and Buffalo Exchange where I found no dresses that fit, but Lee found a pair of sneakers he liked a lot.

- Ate at Blossoming Lotus - the tempeh maple avocado sandwich is one of my new favorite things to eat in Portland. Very healthy for a sandwich with sprouted bread, even. I also had "live fudge" (no sugar, but very tasty) and Agave Lemonade.

- Then we crossed the river again and sat on a pier for a while looking at the water, the Festival across the river and a number of adult and baby geese and Lee asked me to marry him. (just seeing if you're paying attention.) I said yes. :)

- Then we went to People's and got some groceries and stopped at a rummage sale on our way home.

It was a good day.

Love,
Jennifer

I have a small piece of wood lodged in my ass.

Which is almost like saying "I have a stick up my butt," but not quite, and it definitely feels different.

I imagine, however, that both sensations would be unpleasant.

Somehow I have to find non-existent time tomorrow to try to convince PSU Health Services to remove this stick from my ass. Wish me luck.

I saw some dead blossoms flying off of the trees while I was biking today and I thought - "Oh well, there's always next year."

That's when I realized that it's difficult now to imagine living anywhere without cherry blossoms, even though I had never lived anywhere with cherry blossoms prior to 7 years ago.

The woman who organized the Sam Adams rally back in the day (and whom I friended on Facebook) wrote on her status - "Vegan cupcakes are a sign that we've taken this whole Portland thing too far." Then in her comments she said they leave a weird aftertaste and wrote "ptui!"

WHAT????

A) Who the hell doesn't like vegan cupcakes? I mean, unless she was eating weird mutant cupcakes, I haven't met anybody vegan or not who doesn't like a vegan cupcake when they actually try one.

B) She's just commenting on this phenomena? I mean, how long have vegan cupcakes been around in Portland for?

C) Again, who doesn't like vegan cupcakes?

Alright. Mini-rant over.

I realize this isn't really of earth-shaking importance, but there you go.

The irony is, too, that I was eating a vegan cupcake when I read her update.

Tickets to Wisconsin the first week of August are $248 round trip, including taxes. I think I should go. Any people in the Minneapolis area interested in meeting up if I do? ;)

Well, no more Tim and Jen...

Not that I was very good at being long-distance anyways.

Best. Movie. Ever.

April did this and it was interesting, even to answer, so I'm going to do it too...

1. name:
2. birthday:
3. place of residence:
4. what makes you happy:
5. what are you listening to now/have listened to last:
6. do you read my lj?:
7. if you do, what is particularly good/bad about it:
8. an interesting fact about you:
9. are you in love/do you have a crush at the moment:
10. favorite place to be:
11. favorite lyric:
12. best time of the year:

recommend:
1. a film:
2. a book:
3. a band, a song and an album:

plus:
1. one thing you like about me:
2. two things you like about yourself:
3. put this in your lj so I can tell you what i think of you:

Although I also "scored very high" for the twins and Lupin.

Your result for The Harry Potter Husband Test...

Mrs. Bill Weasley

Your perfect HP man is Bill Weasley.

Take The Harry Potter Husband Test at HelloQuizzy

So, I never really did update about the awesome karaoke which was sung on Tuesday.

I'd heard about this deal where you could sing all night at Voicebox Karaoke Lounge - over on NW 21st and Hoyt - for $10 on Tuesdays. This is a really good deal, as long as you don't buy too much food (this week, I did), because I sang over 15 songs, maybe even more, and I usually tip $1 a song. This is also great because karaoke at Voicebox starts at 4:00 rather than 9:00 and it's both an easy streetcar ride from PSU and an easy bus ride home on the 17 which stops just down the block. To sweeten the deal even further, starting next week they will be offering four different kinds of vegan dumplings! WTF? You mean I'm not going to get stuck with french fries or a hummus platter?*

While this won't replace karaoke at The Ambassador**, I think I'll be going to Voicebox almost every week. It will be good to get my voice back in shape again, so I can feel confident once I'm back at the Ambassador, and I can try totally absurd songs that I would never think of doing over there. Songs that are out of my range or just plain ridiculously cheesy.

Here, then, is a sampling of the songs I did on Tuesday, by no means comprehensive:
She's Got You PATSY CLINE
Back in Baby's Arms PATSY CLINE
Does Your Mother Know? ABBA
We've Only Just Begun THE CARPENTERS
Bette Davis Eyes KIM CARNES (plugged this in accidentally, found out my voice was damn near perfect for it.)
It Wasn't Me SHAGGY (fun. Must learn confusing, unintelligible rap section)
Leave a Tender Moment Alone BILLY JOEL (Billy Joel's range continues to floor me.)
Whenever, Wherever SHAKIRA (In FLIPPIN' SPANISH! Yeah, that was sort of an accident too, but kind of fun.)
Roam B52's (with April. I think we finally found a song we duet well on.)
Hands Clean ALANNIS MORISSETTE (I pretty much had no voice left at this point.)
The Rainbow Connection (must learn key change button. I know there is one and this one was too high)
I'd Do Anything "OLIVER" (might have been my favorite song of the night. It's not every day you get to belt out old musicals in a Cockney-ish accent.)

Anyway, yeah. Fun times. I am definitely going again next Tuesday if anyone's interested. I'll probably get there around 4:45, since I have to take the streetcar after class, but I don't mind killing time waiting for other people.

*When we joked about this, the proprietor, Scott, said that he would also be offering a hummus platter. You can't escape them in Portland!

** Not that I've gone since January or December anyway! I've been such a hermit!

So, I'm still on my diet, despite a few hiccups.

My diet mainly consists of:

1) writing down everything I eat - which I discontinued, but am going to start up again.
2) being limited to two "treats" a week. The Self Challenge suggests one ridiculously small treat each day (we're talking the equivalent of three Hershey's Kisses). But since I can't keep a chocolate bar in my house without eating the entire thing and then wanting another one, I've decided to eat 2 big treats each week. A treat is, for example, a sweet coffee drink and a cupcake or a soda and popcorn at the movies. I did have one week where I cheated a bit, but other than that it's gone well and there have been days when I haven't craved treats at all.
3) eat a good low-sugar, high fiber breakfast each day - there have also been hiccups with this, but I just bought myself tons of good breakfast food at New Seasons. Since a lot of it was on sale each breakfast comes to about $1. Breakfasts are going to be - Kashi cereal with soymilk, sprouted English muffins with Earth Balance or almond butter and a little bit of something sweet, or waffles with soy sausage patties and a bit of maple syrup. I am excited to eat breakfast already!

As of the first week or so I already lost 4 pounds. I'm adding in exercise now that the podiatrist cleared me for stress fractures. Unfortunately my foot still hurts an unusual amount, but I can deal with pain as long as I know I'm not fucking myself up too much. I just need to get back on the horse, and, supposedly, carrying less weight might help alleviate foot pain anyhow.

As to why I'm on a diet - again, I weigh more now than I ever have, I'm not "in shape" in terms of completing exercise easily, and I know that it will only get more difficult as I get older to form healthy habits, so I may as well do it now. Also, not fitting into my clothes so much. I still have two boxes of clothes which I will review in mid-June. If they don't fit, I guess there will be a grand clothing swap.

Alright. I'm sure that wasn't interesting to anyone but me, but there you have it. My diet update. It helps me to write it down, at least.